Dishing out spicy liberal social commentary and critical thinking news analysis on America, world politics, the news, fun political humor, cartoons - and a little poetry by Independent journalist blogger Denny Lyon.
20 May 2010
Funny Poem Fairy Tale: How Rudeness and Kindness Were Justly Rewarded
Leda and the swan by Mara ~ earth light ~ @ flickr
How Rudeness and Kindness Were Justly Rewarded
ONCE on a time, long years ago
(Just when I quite forget),
Two maidens lived beside the Po,
One blonde and one brunette.
The blonde one's character was mild,
From morning until night she smiled,
Whereas the one whose hair was brown
Did little else than pine and frown.
(I think one ought to draw the line
At girls who always frown and pine!)
The blonde one learned to play the harp,
Like all accomplished dames,
And trained her voice to take C sharp
As well as Emma Eames;
Made baskets out of scented grass,
And paper-weights of hammered brass,
And lots of other odds and ends
For gentleman and lady friends.
(I think it takes a deal of sense
To manufacture gifts for gents!)
The dark one wore an air of gloom,
Proclaimed the world a bore,
And took her breakfast in her room
Three mornings out of four.
With crankiness she seemed imbued,
And everything she said was rude:
She sniffed, and sneered, and, what is more,
When very much provoked, she swore!
(I think that I could never care
For any girl who'd learned to swear!)
One day the blonde was striding past
A forest, all alone,
When all at once her eyes she cast
Upon a wrinkled crone,
Who tottered near with shaking knees,
And said: "A penny, if you please!"
And you will learn with some surprise
This was a fairy in disguise!
(I think it must be hard to know
A fairy who's incognito!)
The maiden filled her trembling palms
With coinage of the realm.
The fairy said: "Take back your alms!
My heart they overwhelm.
Henceforth at every word shall slip
A pearl or ruby from your lip!"
And, when the girl got home that night, -
She found the fairy's words were right!
(I think there are not many girls
Whose words are worth their weight in pearls!)
It happened that the cross brunette,
Ten minutes later, came
Along the self-same road, and met
That bent and wrinkled dame,
Who asked her humbly for a sou.
The girl replied: "Get out with you!"
The fairy cried: "Each word you drop,
A toad from out your mouth shall hop!"
(I think that nothing incommodes
One's speech like uninvited toads!)
And so it was, the cheerful blonde
Lived on in joy and bliss,
And grew pecunious, beyond
The dreams of avarice
And to a nice young man was wed,
And I have often heard it said
No other man who ever walked
Most loved his wife when most she talked!
(I think this very fact, forsooth,
Goes far to prove I tell the truth!)
The cross brunette the fairy's joke
By hook or crook survived,
But still at every word she spoke
An ugly toad arrived,
Until at last she had to come
To feigning she was wholly dumb,
Whereat the suitors swarmed around,
And soon a wealthy mate she found.
(I think nobody ever knew
The happier husband of the two!)
The Moral of the tale is: Bah!
Nous avons change tout cela.
No clear idea I hope to strike
Of what our nicest girl is like,
But she whose best young man I am
Is not an oyster, nor a clam!
by Guy Wetmore Carryl (1873-1904)
"How Rudeness and Kindness Were Justly Rewarded" is reprinted from Grimm Tales Made Gay. Guy Wetmore Carryl. Boston: Houghton Mifflin, 1902.
*** Return to original post: Funny Poet: Guy Wetmore Carryl
*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!
Labels: news, US, women, politics, funny
American humorist,
fairy tales,
funny fairy tales,
funny poems,
funny poets,
Gilded Age of literature,
Guy Wetmore Carryl,
How Rudeness and Kindness Were Justly Rewarded,
mocking fairy tales
Recent Posts and Archive
-
▼
2010
(415)
-
▼
May
(55)
- Funny Late Night Comedy Roundup - 31 May 2010
- Funny Video: Colberts ThreatDown of Food Police, ...
- Funny Video: Colbert Mocks Surburban Backyard Clo...
- Funny Video: Colbert Gives Domino Pizza Alpha Dog...
- Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 30 May 2010
- Obama Cowers to BP: Rejects Super Tankers for Gul...
- Whats Happening in America This Week: BP Oil Spill...
- Peace Upon The Land poem – Libations Friday 28 May...
- Check It Out: Rolling Stones Mag Names 5 Best Song...
- BP Oil Spill Funny Quotes and Jokes: Cheeky Quote ...
- BP Oil Spill: White House Updated News - 24 May 2010
- Transcript of White House Press Briefing on 24 May...
- Roundup of Late Night Funnies and Funny Videos - 2...
- Funny Video: Outgoing British Leaders Walk of Sha...
- Funny Video: Colbert Mocks Glenn Beck for Compari...
- Funny Video: Jon Stewart Sees BP Fixing Oil Spill ...
- Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 23 May 2010
- America This Week: World Politics Cartoons and Com...
- Jazz Music poem - Libations Friday 21 May 2010
- Funny Poet: Guy Wetmore Carryl
- Funny Poem Fairy Tale: How Rudeness and Kindness W...
- Funny Poem Fairy Tale: How Beauty Contrived to Ge...
- Funny Poem Fairy Tale: The Singular Sangfroid of ...
- Funny Poem Fairy Tale: How Little Red Riding Hood ...
- Funny Poem Fairy Tale: The Embarrassing Episode o...
- Funny Volcano and Weather Quotes - Cheeky Quote Da...
- Scientists: New Airport Scanners Not Safe
- Roundup of Late Night Funnies - 17 May 2010
- Funny Video: Stewart Skewers Conservatives 4 Obam...
- Funny Video: Colbert Lampoons Kagan Confirmation ...
- Posts Roundup This Week at Dennys Blogs - 16 May 2010
- BP Oil Spill Funny Political Cartoons - 15 May 2010
- Love Gift Poem - Libations Friday 14 May 2010
- 3 Funny Videos: Hilarious Betty White On SNL, Ca...
- Funny Wall Street Quotes and Jokes, Stewart Lampoo...
- One Million Homeowners Walked Away: Can It Kill Ou...
- Video: The Case For Walking Away From Your Mortgage
- Video: Are Mortgage Walkaways Going Viral?
- Video: YouWalkAway.com
- Video: Walking Away From A Mortgage
- Roundup of Late Night Funnies - 10 May 2010
- Funny Video: 2010 White House Correspondents Dinn...
- Funny Video: Stewart Slams Media, BP, And Hypocri...
- Funny Video: Colbert Lampoons Conservative Preache...
- Posts Roundup This Week at Dennys Blogs 9 May 2010
- Oil Spill Disaster Cartoons - Whats Happening This...
- One Mother and One Child poem 4 Mothers Day - Liba...
- Transocean Kidnapped Oil Rig Survivors, Coerced Si...
- Funny Parenting Quotes 4 Mothers Day - Cheeky Quot...
- BP Only Responsible to $75 Million 4 Oil Disaster...
- Roundup of Late Night Funnies - 3 May 2010
- Video: Jon Stewart Lampoons Arizona Immigration Law
- Video: Colbert Lampoons BP Oil Slick
- Posts Roundup This Week at Dennys Blogs 2 May 2010
- Whats Happening in America This Week: Wall Street...
-
▼
May
(55)