Cheeky Quote Day! 2 September 2009

From Denny: This retro poster looks like it should be subtitled "The Bright Ideas Club"! Amazingly fun things you can find on StumbleUpon...

Today I thought I'd concentrate on the cheeky quotes from one author and who better to start on a roll with than someone from America's early entertainment history: Will Rogers.

Will Rogers was an American actor, 1879 - 1935, was part Cherokee Indian from his mother and his father was a former slaveholder and Confederate veteran. Rogers was a simple plain-spoken cowboy from Oklahoma who made America laugh in the 1920's and 1930's.

He would get on stage dressed as a cowboy and start doing rope tricks as he would tell a story or whip out a funny quote that set the audience into uproarious laughter in an instant. Rogers was known for his public image of wry, genial common sense and that's what made him so popular throughout America.

His roping skills were so good that he was listed in the Guinness Book of World Records. What roping trick won him the prize? He threw three lassos all at once: one caught the neck of the running horse, another would hoop around the rider and the third one swooped up under the horse to loop all four legs. Pretty cool trick!

Because of these roping tricks he earned his way easily in Hollywood starting with a movie called "Ropin' Fool." He carried on his roping entertainment in Wild West shows, vaudeville stages too, where he evolved his act by telling small jokes. Eventually, people were more interested in his joke-telling than his incredible roping skills.

Though he was a high school dropout, something he greatly regretted, he decided to never stop learning in life. He talked to well-educated people often and read and studied on his own. Over time he wrote six books and published over two million words.

He was a big hit on Broadway and starred in 71 movies. He wrote more than 4,000 syndicated newspaper columns. Rogers was known for befriending Presidents, Senators and Kings. He traveled around the world three times as he was covering wars, learning as much as he could about everything in life and he talked a lot about peace.

His most famous quote: "I never met a person I didn't like." This was his credo of real love and respect for his fellow humanity and all people everywhere. Rogers was known for giving his own money to disaster victims and also raised thousands for the Red Cross and Salvation Army.

Rogers was a professional as he worked as a radio commentator, silent movie star and vaudeville headliner. His original take on life and observation of politics ended up syndicated in daily and weekly newspapers across the country, over 600 of them. He was so popular because his hilarious philosophies really did embody the humorous heart of the nation at that time.

Rogers was killed in a plane crash with his friend, Wiley Post, a daring one-eyed pilot also from Oklahoma, on a trip to Alaska. Rogers loved the thrill of flying as much as fast horses.

His amusing views on politics, government, education and life in general are as true today as they were in his time.

Image via Wikipedia

Quotes from humorist Will Rogers

* And the thing about my jokes is, they don't hurt anybody. You can take 'em or leave 'em - you can say they're funny or they're terrible or they're good, or whatever, but you can just pass 'em by. But with Congress, every time they make a joke, it's a law! And every time they make a law, it's a joke!

Politics and Government:

* A fool and his money are soon elected.

* A difference of opinion is what makes horse racing and missionaries.

* About all I can say for the United States Senate is that it opens with a prayer and closes with an investigation.

* Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate, now what's going to happen to us with both a House and a Senate?

* Anything important is never left to the vote of the people. We only get to vote on some man; we never get to vote on what he is to do.

* Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing, and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even.

* An economist's guess is liable to be as good as anybody else's.

* Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.

* I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.

* Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated.

* The 1928 Republican Convention opened with a prayer. If the Lord can see His way clear to bless the Republican Party the way it's been carrying on, then the rest of us ought to get it without even asking.

* If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics.

* If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress.

* Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock.

* I bet after seeing us, George Washington would sue us for calling him "father."

* This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.

* If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep.

* One-third of the people in the United States promote, while the other two-thirds provide.

* It's easy being a humorist when you've got the whole government working for you.

* I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.

* The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, "How is the president?"

* The more you observe politics, the more you've got to admit that each party is worse than the other.

Education:

* America is becoming so educated that ignorance will be a novelty. I will belong to the select few.

* Why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as well as prohibition did, in five years Americans would be the smartest race of people on Earth.

Business:

* A holding company is a thing where you hand an accomplice the goods while the policeman searches you.

* If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them.

Food:

* An onion can make people cry but there's never been a vegetable that can make people laugh.

Life:

* The fellow that can only see a week ahead is always the popular fellow, for he is looking with the crowd. But the one that can see years ahead, he has a telescope but he can't make anybody believe that he has it.

* The only way you can beat the lawyers is to die with nothing.

* Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.

* We can't all be heroes, because somebody has to sit on the curb and applaud when they go by.

* We are all here for a spell, get all the good laughs you can.

* Live your life so that whenever you lose, you're ahead.

* Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip.